Wedding Fails

So let me start by stating that I am no Fashion Guru, although I do try to follow fashion, I am not a slave for fashion either. Yet I do think that I know a thing or two about what to wear that suits my figure (thanks to the constant money spending on magazines and the time spent on the net looking at dresses that fit a curvy figure). I believe that with a little research a fashion disaster can easily be avoided nonetheless many people still fail miserably at looking their best.

 My concern on this matter has been haunting me for ages, how people go wrong in their fashion choices. Lately I have attended a wedding of a friend of mine and although the bride, groom and entourage looked superb, the guests were a complete different story. It amazes me how some women think they look great in some dresses. There are some basic rules to follow when one attends a wedding.

Firstly knee high boots are not appropriate for a wedding, yes knee high boots, that’s what I said,  you are not going for a hardcore night at Paceville, and to make it worse she had leg warmers coming up from underneath the boots. This was followed by a mini skirt with the most hideous design that I wish to never ever witness again in my life.  This fashion disaster Ied to me taking 3 strong Jack Daniels shots. And when I thought that I had seen it all from this particular guest, she decided that her shoes were hurting her, so she took off her unsightly boots to reveal her neon striped socks, and then goes to dance in the middle of the dance floor.

If it was my wedding I would have kicked her out, if your shoes are hurting sit down and rest a little but don’t make it known what your socks are. As much as they look funky over the shop counter they are not to be exposed in the middle of a wedding.

It is a fact that us women enjoy torturing our legs for that extra height, and I am no exception, the higher the better is my motto. But what most women fail to see/ do/ practice before going out with these shoes is to check where it hurts most. I have this guiding principle to go round the house with a new pair of shoes to check if I will need plasters when I wear it in front of people. The amount of women that you see walking like penguins by the end of a night like this is uncountable. And believe me you are not sexy at all. Try wearing comfortable shoes when you are attending an event where chairs are difficult to get hold off. 

Another fashion crime that I saw at this particular wedding is when women wear dresses that that do not do them justice; if you have chubby hands do not wear strapless dresses, and if your boobs cannot be kept in place with a strapless bra do not try fooling anybody with the plastic straps, seriously, they are worse than a toupe. If you are opting for a strapless dress try wearing a scarf to cover up but please try to keep it simple a nice small bolero will do, silver scarves that look like tin foil ( yes unfortunately I had to witness that too ) are not aesthetically pleasing. 

I believe some people fail to see that less is more, and in a wedding especially. I am big fan of accessories and I can never have enough of them, but in wedding I try to keep it plain and simple, a nice small bracelet with a matching necklace is always appropriate. Some women (mostly the older generation ) decide to wear all the gold that they can get hold of. Less is more and if I can get people to understand that I will believe that there is a God after all. (Sorry Mum)